Hairy Toes

Just the title of my blog makes you want to dry heave.  I get it, I'm dry heaving myself.  But, why?

So, not only am I terrible in the kitchen, look like I'm six months pregnant and usually smell of stale smoke and have red wine stains on my teeth, but my feet are hairy too.  I'm tired of being in the closet about this.  I've been keeping it in for too long.

Don't get me wrong, I do a whack of self maintenance to keep this hair problem in check.  But, from time to time, I get a little lazy and I forget about my hairy friends.  Sometimes I look down and they're blowing in the wind.  I end up tying them back until I can get home to wax those suckers off.

Recently, I was forced to tell my secret.  It had been months since my toes had seen an indoor pool and I had to confess to a good friend my warped truth.  Before she had a chance to look down, I blurted out "I HAVE HAIR ON MY TOES".  She just looked at me and said, "So do I."  WTF?  All of these years I've been fancying myself a freak and here she was telling me that she combs her toe hair too.  Jesus Murphy.

So, I opened up about my secret to more women and guess what???  We all have hairy toes. Yes you do. I've even squeezed it out of those who initially denied it.  No more shame ladies, let the hair flow wild and free.

But here's my question...why is it so terrible?  It's not my fault that I was blessed with hair follicles on my little buddies.  Let's face it, we don't ralph when we see men's hairy feet, and they are ALWAYS jacked up.  How can we possibly hate something that we can't control?

I confessed my hairy sin to an esthetician on Friday.  She told me that most women have hair on their toes because they are usually cold.  Not my fault it's minus 50 outside.  So, let it all loose ladies.  No more shame.  Braid it, spike it, shave it, wax it, but don't hate it.  After all, it's not your fault.  Life is too short (and hopefully your toe hair is too).

Love the hair you're with.

XO

A